What To Say To Someone Just Diagnosed With Breast Cancer

What To Say To Someone Just Diagnosed With Breast Cancer – Today we will tell 7 youth that they have cancer. Despite being a word that affects everyone (directly or indirectly), the “Big C” is still a taboo subject because of the fear that surrounds it. Research shows that as a result of cancer treatment in teens, 87% of patients lose touch with their friends. If we can start conversations about it, it will help those affected and lead to risk elimination and early diagnosis.

As part of our campaign with FVCK Cancer – a headphone brand working to support people struggling with hair loss due to chemotherapy – we caught up with designer Emily McDowell. Emily was diagnosed with stage 3 Hodgkin lymphoma in 2001 when she was only 24 years old. Over the next 9 months of treatment, you will notice that family and friends are struggling to find the right words to say. And the comfort cards you get don’t help – ranging from indifferent to cold, they say nothing about your situation. Ranging from sarcastic humor to downright satire, Emily’s cards tell the story while still being kind and comforting. Check them out below, along with some of your own advice about what to say to someone with cancer.

What To Say To Someone Just Diagnosed With Breast Cancer

Our culture doesn’t teach us how to talk about illness, so when this illness happens to someone in our lives, many of us feel really inadequate to deal with it. We’re afraid of saying the wrong thing, so we hesitate, and then time passes, then we feel even more excited, but now we still feel guilty, making it difficult to approach them. But for a Cancer man, it feels strange and painful when friends remain silent. Remember that no one is left to worry, and if you don’t know what to say, it’s okay to say so. Your friend doesn’t even know what it’s like to have cancer—and what they need most is your willingness to be left alone.

High Blood Pressure And Body Weight

Being solution-oriented serves us well in everyday life, so when someone we care about is sick, our first instinct is often to go into “do better” mode, where we immediately try to solve their problem. Let’s try to help. Questions and thoughts. But it is impossible to cure someone’s illness, and you should not do it.

The most helpful thing you can do for them is to be willing to show up, be present, listen, and stay quiet if they don’t want to talk. Silence is not inherently unpleasant, it just feels different because we are not used to it. Fortunately, learning to listen is much easier than finding those harmless “right words” that won’t come.

Find out how they feel. “How are you?” It sounds pretty basic, but many people will appreciate it. He tells people that he remembers and cares about what’s going on, but that he doesn’t need a long commitment to conversation if they don’t want to talk.

Sometimes, the best question is “How are you today?” Adding “today” to your question confirms that overall, you know that your life generally gets worse over time and that you understand that you have good days and bad days. Day. You may also feel like this is a difficult question, like “How do I deal with this cancer?” And makes it flexible.

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Or option: “How’s that for you?” or “How’s he going?” Let’s say you ask your friend how you are and he says, “Fine. I’m halfway through my development.” Instead of ending in response or introducing your story – like, “Wow, halfway there!” or “My sister is really struggling with her development,” try asking this. A good time would be to ask, “How’s it going for you?” This will give your friend a lot of freedom to respond however they want, and let them know you’re interested in hearing about their experience.

Your friend with cancer neither needs nor wants you to send them links to the healing properties of green juice or that experimental treatment you’re reading about. Trust that when people are going through this, they have spent more time than usual thinking about their treatment options, and they have chosen what they feel is the right course of action. Even more than that. If they specifically ask for your opinion, feel free to give your opinion, but don’t give unsolicited advice.

Don’t try to offer spiritual advice that will give them a new perspective on life or that will “make them feel better.” For example, you may personally believe that everything happens for a reason, but trying to impose this belief on someone who has an illness will make them feel unheard and awkward, which is the opposite of your intention. Is.

Trying to “talk to you” by bringing up something that has happened to you, or a story you’ve heard, can prevent you from knowing how the person really feels about what’s happening. Is. And endless hope (“You’ve got this!”) can feel like an empty platitude, which can make people feel like you don’t want to hear it.

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When you feel like you want to help, you may want to do too much to make the situation better, which can lead to depression or a feeling of obligation, which will make you less likely to help. It is also a natural impulse to ask the patient what he or she needs. But to do this your friend has to emotionally work out what they need (because often, when we try, we don’t know what we need), and then ask for it, which will help in any way. It is difficult for the person. Feels like a burden.

Instead, think of something you can do well and with pleasure, and do it—or just do it. Don’t worry if the gesture is too small to feel meaningful to you; It’s better to make a little sacrifice than to toss and turn because you feel tired and choose to do nothing. And smaller gestures are often more meaningful to the recipient. The most important thing is to come up with something you’re truly happy doing – and then do it.

Emily McDowell is the Founder and Creative Director of M&Friends. Check out our full selection of sentimental cards and gifts to support Em and Friends at Emandfriends.com.

Emily is also the co-author (with Dr. Kelsey Crowe) and illustrator of No Good Map for This: What to Say and Do When Life Is Scary, Horrible, and Unfair to the People You Love. Find the book here. A few months ago we published a list of 12 things (click here to read) that you should never say to someone living with a chronic illness. We thought it would be fun to do a selection and provide a list of 12 things to say to someone living with a chronic illness…or at least what you want to say to people instead!

I Just Learned I Only Have Months To Live. This Is What I Want To Say.

1. I know you’re not coming to the office, but I’m leaving a bag of stuff out for you.

In our opinion, this is the best gesture you can do for someone this season. If someone asks, “Can I get you something?”, most of the time people will answer ‘no’ because they don’t want to be a burden. Saying that you are skipping some basic food items for someone takes the decision out of their hands and most of the time meal timings are very helpful and always appreciated.

It is important to recognize the constant battle the mind is fighting. It may not be easy for them, but having someone accept them gives them much-needed validation for their struggle.

Someone may not be up for shopping or being in crowds all day, but that doesn’t mean you won’t want to bring a blanket and snacks for a fun movie night.

Things That People Say To A Person With Chronic Illness (but Should Not)

We’re always impressed when someone asks this, it shows not only that they care, but also that they care enough to want details!

6. Can you send me something about your situation? I would like to understand you a little better?

It’s hard to understand situations you haven’t gone through, ask your friend to give them an article about what they’ve been through, it will be greatly appreciated.

This is not putting pressure on the person, but rather showing them that you will be there when they are ready to reach out.

Making Good Friends

This comment is worth its weight in gold. A person suffering from a chronic illness may avoid making plans for fear of cancellation. Unpredictability is the name of the game, let them know you understand and know they aren’t messing around!

Showering and styling your hair is sometimes enough to get you through the day, but it gives you a little boost if you feel clean and organized. can help

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